what works for you

I send my husband emails. frequently. they serve as our reminders back and forth of errands to run, plans to make, even sometimes discussion topics on days when we won't see one another much. And I used to feel bad about it in a way, like it was akin to sending IMs back and forth with someone in the same room.

But today I was sharing something about that with my co-worker and she smiled and said "but it works for you guys." And she is right. It does work for us, our 21st century relationship and the dynamics of tech-savvy marriage. And at the end of the day, I truly feel like we have open communication and face-to-face connection so I have no reason to dislike our system.

It seems like the longer we are married and go through different seasons of life together, the more I realize I cannot compare our marriage to anyone else's with honest scales. Not because theirs is better or ours is better but because you have to do what works for you and they have to do what works for them.

I think it is so easy in life to look around at what people are involved with, the way they make decisions or spend their money or discuss important issues and see things from our perspective. But sometimes I need someone to remind me that I'm good with the way things work for us, and that is what matters most.